Meeting Someone For the First Time After Texting? (Follow These 7 Tips)

In this brief guide, we will discuss some tips for when you are meeting someone for the first time after texting, and discuss meeting someone after online dating awkwardness.

Meeting Someone For the First Time After Texting

Meeting someone for the first time after texting can be a very emotional thing, and you can feel very awkward or nervous about it, but it may help you to know that they are probably just as nervous and afraid, so you could actually talk to them about 

This kind of meeting has been very hyped and most people are scared of meeting someone after texting them or talking to them online because of shows like Catfish, which have shown us just how difficult the online scene can be, and how often you can be duped by people.

It is very easy for someone, especially someone young and naive, to fall into the gray area between meeting online or texting someone and meeting them for the first time in real life.

Texting someone for ages makes you quite close to them, and it is capable of building an almost intimate bond because you are talking all the time, all day, sharing the most trivial things, and in some ways it sort of ends up being more intimate than the regular dating situations can be.

However, because one has already created this sort of intimate bond, meeting someone for the first time after texting them can become very intimidating, because you may feel like you are going back one step and starting to get to know someone you already know very well, more intimately.

This kind of discrepancy and dissonance in how we feel about someone can often make meeting someone you have been texting for some harder when you do it face-to-face, because now your meeting is full of high stakes and confusion, because how do you get to know someone you already know?

Another problem when meeting someone for the first time after texting is that you already have a relationship of sorts, you are already getting along very well, so there is also a risk that you will lose the relationship if things don’t work, or that the texting may have been an illusion of happiness, a bubble, that will break when you finally meet.

These worries will plague almost anyone that is meeting someone for the first time after texting, because we all have the same preferences and the same needs at our crux, and everything else we desire is usually secondary to who we are as people. Overthinking and intrapersonal conflict can not be conducive to this situation obviously.

If you are really worried about meeting someone for the first time after texting, you can always do a pre-date texting sort of thing to check for deal-breakers, and more importantly, for safety reasons. 

Another important thing in meeting someone for the first time after texting is when should you do it? The answer to this comes from online dating coach and relationship expert Damona Hoffman, who says you can move quite soon, in fact, the sooner the better.

“You want to keep the texting light, playful and short-lived before the first date, when you are getting to know someone over text, you inevitably end up sharing things that you would never say face-to-face.”

Another dating expert and relationship coach, Julie Spira explains, “Since singles are chatting with multiple people at a time, after a few days, or a few weeks, the decision to meet will lose its spark, or your digital flirtation might find someone else in the process, texting is a great way to ramp up your digital flirting with someone you’ve met online.”

Meeting Someone For the First Time After Talking Online: Tips

While meeting someone for the first time after talking online is great and can be fun, it can be very difficult, so here are some of the best tips for meeting someone for the first time after talking online:

  • Meet in a public place and make sure a close friend or family member knows where you are.
  • Try to meet for a more casual thing like coffee or a drink.
  • Try to meet in the daytime for the first time.
  • Keep the first meeting as free from expectations as you can.
  • Talk to them about nerves beforehand, it will help them to know that you are nervous too.
  • Try some activities you can do together in the first meeting.
  • Take pictures and make sure you keep some mementos if you have a good time.
  • Go in with a positive attitude; if it turns out well, you’ll have fun, if not, it’ll still make for a good story.
  • Split the bill with them, whether you are a boy or girl.

Meeting Someone For the First Time After Texting: Awkward!

While meeting someone for the first time after texting can be nerve-wracking, it can also be awkward, because you have been talking to this person for so long you know them very well, yet you are going to be meeting a perfect stranger, the difference there is quite confusing.

Therefore, you can use some help, so here are some of the best tips to not be awkward when meeting someone for the first time after texting:

  • Talk about it plenty beforehand.
  • Address the awkwardness with them over the texts, or even in person.
  • Laugh; laughter is the best antidote to awkwardness, so tell jokes, rehash funny tales.
  • Bring up things you have texted about previously.
  • Ask them if they have done this before, if they have, ask them what they found helps with the awkwardness.
  • If they haven’t done it before, find common ground in your discovery of something new.
  • Find common ground in general, bond over coffee or the drink you are having or something in your surroundings.
  • Choose an activity to do together rather than meet for just coffee or drink.
  • Meet in a lively atmosphere.
  • Meet in a situation that appeals to both of you equally.
  • You can also meet somewhere that is comfortable to you so you don’t have to deal with both a new person and a new environment.

Meeting Someone For the First Time After Texting: Quotes

Here are some of the best quotes about meeting someone for the first time after texting (you can even use them to break the ice!)

“People meeting for the first time suddenly relax if they find they both have cats. And plunge into an anecdote.”: Charlotte Gray

“According to psychologists, when meeting someone for the first time, you have about 7 seconds to make a powerful first impression.”

“Treat each event you attend and each person that you meet as if it were an appointment with one of your best clients — even if you are meeting that person for the very first time.” : Timothy M. Houston

“When you meet somebody for the first time, you’re not meeting them. You’re meeting their representative.”: Chris Rock

“When you meet someone for the first time, that’s not the whole book. That’s just the first page.”: Brody Armstrong

“It’s so rare to meet a person who actually lives up to their reputation.”: Paul Krueger

“I hate meeting someone for the first time I have a connection with online. So scared something will happen and I’ll end up losing them…”

“The saddest thing in life is meeting someone you connect with immediately and realizing you will never see them again.”

“The two hardest things to say in life are ‘hello’ for the first time and ‘goodbye’ for the last.”

“When I meet people for the first time, I always put on my glasses because I feel like that’s a little something extra between me and them.”: Edwidge Danticat

“Whenever I meet people for the first time, I assume that they have a great story to tell and that it’s my job to find it.”: Sarah Ferguson

“Meeting, for the first time in person, someone that you’ve ‘known’ for some time online = Taking the relationship to the ‘previous’ level.”: Mokokoma Mokhonoana

Conclusion

 In this brief guide, we discussed some tips for when you are meeting someone for the first time after texting, and discuss meeting someone after online dating awkwardness.

Meeting someone for the first time after texting may sound totally easy to do and something that should come quite naturally, you know this person, after all, but that is not always the case at all, and sometimes it can be very awkward and nerve-wracking meeting someone like that.

Human beings are very dependent on non-verbal cues and body language in communication, which are part of what make up the “vibes’ you get from someone, and if you haven’t felt these “vibes” from someone yet, you may not even be able to make up your mind about them properly.

If you have any questions or comments about meeting someone for the first time after texting, please feel free to reach out to us at any time.

Frequently Asked Questions (FAQs): Meeting Someone For the First Time After Texting

How soon should you text after meeting someone?

You can text someone as soon as you want, after meeting them, if you have something to say to them or if you just want to hear from them and talk to them, you don’t have to go by the commonly mentioned dating rule of “wait 3 days”, because that belonged to an era when we weren’t constantly connected and when instant messaging was not a thing.

In fact, if you really like someone and you have just met them, texting them soon after they have gone away is a wonderful thing to do because it will make them feel desired, and even some surveys suggest that about 89% of women want to be first contacted within 48 hours. 

Should I text him first after meeting?

Yes, of course you can text him first after meeting, there are no rules anymore that say that the man should always be taking the first step or doing all the work in a relationship, because if there is one thing feminism has given us successfully, it is the capability of going out and talking to whoever we want as and when we want it.

What do you say when you text a guy for the first time?

Here are some things you can say when you text a guy for the first time:

Don’t think you’re wrong with “hi.” sometimes the pressure of being witty can ruin things before they even start
Include something personal and directed at him with the hi or hello.
Don’t text him too late at night. 
Wait for him to reply and don’t get impatient and start texting over and over again
Ask questions and show interest in what he texts back
If it seems like he’s ending a conversation don’t push back and let it end naturally.
Don’t get obsessive about texting him and become glued to your phone.

Do guys text you if they like you?

Yes, guys will text you if they like you, unless there’s a problem with their phone or they are otherwise preoccupied, but usually a guy will not play games and mess around if he really likes you, and you will surely be getting his text.

Citations

https://bestfamilylife.com/meeting-someone-for-the-first-time-in-person-after-texting/#:~:text=Gently%20suggest%20about%20meeting%20for%20the%20first%20time%20in%20person,-It%20is%20all&text=Gently%20propose%20when%20you%20are,to%20go%20out%20with%20you.

https://www.courant.com/hartford-magazine/hc-hm-first-date-survival-guide-20190127-20190125-w3lha6yggrfwjjotqtr3mahgti-story.html

https://www.elitedaily.com/p/how-long-should-you-text-before-having-a-first-date-experts-weigh-in-9051542

Divya is currently a Clinical Psychology Trainee in a Master of Philosophy program and holds a Master’s in clinical psychology. She has a special interest in Personality studies and disorders, having researched the subject before, and Neuropsychology; with an additional interest being Mood disorders. She likes to write about Psychiatric issues, having worked in multiple specialty setups during her time as a clinical psychology student, and in her free time she likes to cook and read.