How to Improve Your Personality (3 Steps)

This article looks at how one can improve their personality by focusing on 3 main areas; thoughts, feelings and behaviors. The article will also attempt to explain how improving one area of focus will lead to better performance in the other two areas that are central components to one’s personality!

How to Improve Your Personality?

You can improve your personality by focusing on the following areas:

  • Your Feelings
  • Your Thoughts
  • Your Behaviours

It seems pretty difficult but it’s not. 

Although we find it difficult to control our behavior sometimes and experience unwanted thoughts that make us feel angry or unpleasant, not to mention feelings which are even more difficult to control, this article will take you step by step on how to improve each one of these components to achieve the best version of you!

The First Step: Improving Your Behaviour

Your behaviour is what defines you! It is how you conduct yourself especially towards others. Our personality and behaviour affect each other; sometimes our personality comprises traits that may result in a behaviour such as that of being lazy, lying or even becoming angry. However, at times it is the opposite where our behaviour that may involve a lack of exercise and necessary activity results in us developing a lazy personality. After all, personality is a result of one’s behavior and genetics!

The following section will guide us on how we can improve our behaviour in order to ultimately improve our personality!

Change Your Environment

Do you get angry too quickly? Do you feel bored or tired of the regular routine that makes you feel even more lazy? Are you eating too much that has led you to become overweight and lose a sense of control on your eating habits?

The answer may be in changing your environment. Sometimes there are triggers or stimuli in the environment we preside in that make us carry out certain behaviours. It seems very insignificant but a small change can make a huge difference. 

For example, if an individual has developed  a habit of eating too much it’s possible there is something in the environment that is encouraging it. Check your surroundings? Is there a cafe nearby? Are the people around you more focused on eating or adopting a healthier lifestyle? Also, is there anything in your area that reminds you of food? Changing your environment can greatly affect your behaviour by removing the triggers that cause your behavior to occur.

People who engage in behaviors that are due to stress, anxiety or tension are encouraged to change their environment too so that they stay away from any triggers of their current state. 

So next time you want to change a specific habit or behaviour, remember, change your environment! It helps you achieve the change you want faster.

Change What You Eat!

Nowadays, many bad things that happen to us are because of the food we eat. It’s unhealthy, loaded with sugar and oil and doesn’t contain enough nutrients.Not only does it harm our health but it makes us lazy! If you want to change your behaviour you need to be able to feel fresh, motivated and light! 

To be able to feel that way one must eat right. Start adopting better eating habits. Help your body make the change by giving it what it needs. Eat foods that are light, full of nutrients and avoid too much sugar and oil.

Give Up That One Bad Habit 

Self control is vital for any human being to progress. We develop bad habits everyday but who says we can’t give them up? The mistake we make is that we tend to believe that in order to reach our goals or make big changes we need to change everything! That is not true.

It’s proven that smaller changes that are consistent lead to long term results. Sit down and relax. Think about the small things that are detrimental to your physical and emotional health. Make a list and decide which ones it is that you want to start off with first; there is no need to hurry, take one step at a time. There are many bad habits in our behaviour that we can change like those below:

  • Using our phone and other devices for unproductive things for long durations
  • Not eating enough greens
  • Wasting food by getting or buying too much in the first place
  • Not controlling one’s anger and blurting out whatever comes to one’s mind
  • Not engaging in regular exercise

Take one bad habit and make a pledge to avoid it and monitor yourself for two weeks. Once you are satisfied take another one and do the same thing. Slowly you will achieve better and better behaviour.

The Second Step: Analyze and Filter Your Thoughts

If you thought more closely, you would be surprised what you were thinking. Sometimes our personality is affected by too many negative and unpleasant thoughts. We think without thinking and allow those thoughts over time to not only corrode our thinking but our personality too!

Here are a few ways you can manage your thoughts to lead to a better version of you!

Meditation – A Way To Relax Yourself!

One of the best things you can do for your mind is to empty it of any worry and focus it on your present environment and your body. Meditation helps you take your mind off the past and present. There is no harm to just focus on the present; it’s actually good for you so why not try it?

Try to go to a serene place that you can access easily most days and where there is no noise disturbance. Get yourself ready in the sense that you feel fresh and relaxed; maybe taking a bath or applying your favorite cream or drinking some green tea can help!

Once you are ready sit down in an upright position that is comfortable and just breathe! Try to listen to the natural noise around you; the wind, the tweeting birds and even the little insects – appreciate nature. Next, try to focus on your body; breathe in and out deeply. This doesn’t just help you breathe properly but helps your mind relax.

Do this for a few minutes everyday and you will learn how to relax your mind even in the most difficult of times! It will help you develop a stronger and more calm version of yourself.

Write Your Thoughts Down.

Sometimes our thoughts can be scary. They can make us think negatively and they can even affect the relationships around us because of what we utter from our mouth. It can be difficult to control our thoughts and the eventual actions we commit because of them so it’s important we recognize them so we can take the right action.

Firstly, try and remember what bad thoughts you usually have and list them down. Study and analyze these thoughts and try to see if they are logical. Most of the time, we realize these thoughts don’t make sense and we immediately regret any action we took on their basis.

Once you have these thoughts written down, monitor yourself in a situation that is likely to trigger them. As soon as you identify these thoughts stop yourself and sit down. Drink a glass of water and tell yourself that you are experiencing irrational thoughts.

Such exercises are very helpful in identifying and controlling negative thoughts. With practice one can permanently remove detrimental thoughts so that they can adopt a better and healthier way of living!

The Third Step: Regulate Your Feelings

Our feelings are a result of our thoughts and our everyday experiences. Too many bad feelings that persist for over a long time can affect our personality for the worse! 

Here are a few knacks on how to regulate your feelings!

Identify the bad feelings.

Help your body consciously recognize when you feel depressed, angry or tense. What happens is that we allow ourselves to feel this way but do not make a conscious attempt to regulate our feelings. Once we are aware of our inner state and understand what we feel and why it’s easier to avoid such instances.

Regulate Your Feelings.

Once you identify your feelings you need to regulate them. If your feelings are more based on your thoughts you need to challenge yourself; ask questions that confront the thoughts you have, determine if they have a rational basis, think of all the situations that prove your thoughts wrong.

However, if your feelings are more oriented towards your present surroundings such as getting angry due to someone then try and use your behaviour to help regulate your feelings. If you get angry then engage in exercise or drink water or sit down. It will help you distract yourself or allow you to channel your feelings elsewhere.

The important thing is recognizing what you feel, why you feel it and how can you regulate those feelings so you do not cause damage to yourself or others.


The article explained how one can improve their personality by emphasizing that personality is made up of three components namely one’s behaviour, thoughts and feelings and that by working on each component one can achieve a better version of themself!

Frequently Asked Questions: How to Improve Your Personality.

Can you really change your personality?

It was believed for long that one can’t change their personality however recent studies have pointed out that personality can change due to persistent intervention and major life events.

Do you see a need to improve your personality?

Personality development helps you foster a better self and can help you stand apart from the crowd. It can help you perform better and achieve more success.

What does a mental breakdown look like?

People who experience a nervous breakdown usually withdraw from family, friends and co-workers and develop poor sleeping and eating habits. They also avoid attending social functions.


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