Can an extrovert and introvert date? (A Complete Guide)

In this article, we will answer the question ‘Can an extrovert date an introvert?’.  We will do that by initially defining who extroverts and introverts are and how do they differ from each other.  This will follow up by a discussion on dating between extroverts and introverts. We will move on to listing down tips for introverts and extroverts to date. Finally, we will discuss whether extroverts and introverts can marry each other.  

Can an Extrovert and Introvert Date?

Yes.  An extrovert and introvert can date even if they are opposite to each other.  Their relationship can work well as long as both partners are willing to understand each other and make changes according to their partner’s needs. In fact, the opposing traits of both partners can balance out the relationship and help each person to learn and grow. 

Extroverts vs Introverts

The difference between extroverts and introverts is based on how they gain energy. Introverts are internally oriented. This means that interacting and socializing with other people depletes their energy. They require alone time to regain lost energy and spend their time in solitary activities. They also process things in their mind and are not open to a lot of new experiences.

In contrast to them, extroverts are externally oriented.  This means that they lose their energy by being alone.  Whereas. socializing and interacting with other people help them regain their energy. They prefer spending their time in group activities. Also, they process things by talking and are open to many new experiences.

Dating between Extroverts and Introverts

The laws of attraction suggest that people who share similarities are more attracted to each other since they feel comfortable in each other’s presence.  However, there is another law that says that opposites attract.  This applies to extroverts and introverts who are opposite yet dating because they are attracted to each other.  

Being different from each other does not mean that the relationship will not work out.  Rather,  potential issues may arise like in any other relationship but if both partners are prepared and work to resolve them,  the relationship between an extrovert and an introvert can work out pretty well.  The key is to try to find a balance that can only be done through open communication and trial and error. 

Tips for extroverts dating an Introverts

Introverts wish extroverts understood the following things about them and acted accordingly:

  • Introverts do not like making small talk. So, an extrovert should understand that while he or she is out with an introvert,  they should not stand in the middle of the road to make small talk with other people.
  • Introverts like it when they can lean on extroverts during social situations. So, an extrovert should pay special attention to including their introvert partner in a group conversation. 
  • An extrovert should understand that their introvert partner has the capacity to turn on their extrovert side in situations that require it e.g. In a professional setting.  However,  it is quite draining and lacks any real depth.
  • Introverts need time to mentally prepare before socializing. So, their extrovert partner should not spring up social events and situations at the last moment.
  • Introverts have a social limit. When they reach that limit they need to leave the event or social situation as soon as possible as it can overwhelm them. Their extrovert partner should understand that and not compel them to stay for longer periods of time at a party.
  • Introverts need alone time to recharge as isolation is a necessity for them.  Their extrovert partner needs to understand that alone time does not mean they are rejecting them nor should they take offence. Rather, it would be better if they are understanding and give them space. 
  • Introverts do not like it when an extrovert forces them to make new friends. So, their extrovert partner should give them space to make friends naturally and at their own pace. 
  • Introverts dislike it when others label them’ lazy’  or ‘boring’  for needing a night at home.  Their extrovert partner needs to support them and can even join them in a home activity like reading or day dreaming in silence instead of bashing them.
  • If an introvert does not feel like going out, their extrovert partner should go out without them and not worry about leaving them since they function very well and happily on their own. 
  • An introvert needs their partner to understand that when they are quiet it does not mean they are angry.  They just enjoy watching people,  observing,  thinking, and analyzing in silence. 

Tips for introverts dating an extroverts

Extroverts wish introverts understood the following things about them and acted accordingly:

  • Communication is the key introverts can use with their extrovert partners in order for the relationship to work.  They can openly talk about their differences and try to find a balance that works for both people.
  • Extroverts like to socialize with different people.  Their introvert partner should understand that if extroverts are socializing, it does not mean they are rejecting them.  Rather,  it is a way for them to recharge.
  •  Extroverts like to try different activities.  So,  their introvert partner should say yes to things even if it means getting out of the house for one hour.  This is because staying home and rejecting social invitations can actually lower their threshold of handling new social situations.
  •  An introvert honestly communicating their feelings to their extrovert partner can play out much better than holding it in and expecting the other person to read their mind. 
  • Extroverts are not in touch with their feelings like introverts are.  So,  their introvert partner should understand that and let the extroverts talk in order to process their emotions.
  • Even though extroverts enjoy taking the lead and planning dates,  they also like it when their introvert partner takes the initiative.  It is important that they choose places and activities that can work well for both partners.
  • It is important that an introvert does not judge and think that their extrovert partner is not healthy because they like people and are open to trying new things.  Rather,  it is important that introverts give extroverts space to socialize & party; and occasionally help them to calm down and engage in self-reflection.
  • Both extroverts and introverts need to understand each other’s trigger points and avoid them. E.g. Staying home cooped up without attending any social event can trigger extroverts. So, their introvert partner should say yes to social events even if they have to go out only for a little while for their partner’s sake. 
  • Extroverts process things quickly and make decisions at a faster rate than introverts.  Whereas, an introvert does the opposite and takes much longer. This can be interpreted as disapproval or lack of enthusiasm by extroverts. So, an introvert can try to openly express their excitement and gratitude in order to fix such a misunderstanding.
  • An introvert should also understand that their extrovert partner needs alone time as well.

Can an extrovert marry an introvert? 

An extrovert and introvert can marry each other and enjoy a good relationship if they understand each other and give each other space.  Both partners need to be accepting of each other’s differences in processing information and preference of source of energizing.  The key to such a relationship to work is to compromise and look for win-win situations. 

Furthermore,  both partners can balance each other to create a whole as their opposing traits can act as a source of learning and growth for both partners.  However,  it is important that both partners remember why they got attracted to each other in the first place especially when their relationship is facing a difficult time. 

FAQs: ‘can an extrovert marry an introvert’

Do extroverts and introverts make good couples?

Yes. Despite their differences,  extrovert and introvert make great romantic partners.  This is because their opposing traits can help each partner learn and grow.  What one partner lacks can be made up for what the other parts has. 

Are introverts bad at relationships?

No. Introverts are just slow in their pace in relationships.  This is because they open up more slowly and take a long time in reaching relationship milestones compared to an extrovert. However,  if extroverts are patient enough they would find out that introverts make excellent,  patient, considerate, and understanding romantic partners. 

Can you be an extrovert and an introvert at the same time?

Yes. A person having both extroverted and introverted tendencies are called ‘ambiverts’. While they like socializing and having new experiences,  they also need alone time to regain their energy and process things. 

Do extroverts and introverts attract?

Yes. Both extroverts and introverts get attracted to each other since they both possess opposing qualities that the other lacks. This can make their relationship balanced. 

How do you date an extrovert?

One can date an extrovert by following a few tips. Find balance in communication, be honest, say yes to things, and let your partner talk as it is how they process their emotions and thoughts. 

Conclusion

In this article, we answered the question ‘can an extrovert marry and introvert?’. We found that an extrovert and introvert can date as well as marry even if they are opposite to each other.  Their relationship can work well as long as both partners are willing to understand each other and make changes according to their partner’s needs. In fact, the opposing traits of both partners can balance out the relationship. 

 I hope you found this article interesting. If you have any queries or comments, please state them in the comment section 🙂 

Citations

https://www.huffpost.com/entry/introverts-dating-extroverts_n_5abd5736e4b055e50acc4db8#:~:text=Introvert%2Dextrovert%20relationships%20can%20work,types%20balance%20each%20other%20out.

https://www.bustle.com/p/how-to-date-extrovert-when-youre-introvert-according-to-experts-9715457

https://www.bustle.com/p/how-to-date-extrovert-when-youre-introvert-according-to-experts-9715457

Divya is currently a Clinical Psychology Trainee in a Master of Philosophy program and holds a Master’s in clinical psychology. She has a special interest in Personality studies and disorders, having researched the subject before, and Neuropsychology; with an additional interest being Mood disorders. She likes to write about Psychiatric issues, having worked in multiple specialty setups during her time as a clinical psychology student, and in her free time she likes to cook and read.