9w8 Relationships (A Guide)

In this guide, we will delve into understanding the 9w8 Relationships. We will also look at the Enneagram Type Nine with an Eight-Wing, Type Nine and Type Eight personalities.

Enneagram Type Nine with an Eight – Wing constitutes a core component of Type Nine, with certain characteristics of Type Eight.

9w8 Relationships

Enneagram Type Nine with an Eight – Wing, constitutes a core of type 9. There are certain characteristics of type 8. This makes for a unique combination. Here, the fiery, aggressive, and assertive type Eight meets the peaceful type Nine. Drawing from their core, they are generally kind people, with the ability to assert themselves in situations. 

These individuals enjoy the simplicities in life. They enjoy spending time in nature, engaging in physical activities frequently. Consequently, they may excel in athletics. 

They do not display the aggressively assertive tendencies of type Eight. Yet, they are likely to assert themselves in certain situations. Sometimes, this assertiveness may take a back-seat. The laziness of type Nine may overtake, leading them to stay quiet even when the situation demands otherwise. This generally stems from not wanting to confront the situation head-on.

When it comes to relationships, the Enneagram Type Nine with an Eight-Wing makes for reliable partners. They are stable in their approach to the relationship. They are not very demanding of the people in their lives. 9w8 persons are unlikely to make a fuss when situations do not pan out the way they may expect. They like to live and let live. They are not overbearing. They bring their sense of humor to the table which can lighten the mood in their relationships. 

Once they have found someone they trust and love, they are likely to commit to them for a very long time. They are from being fickle-headed partners who are excited at the thought of exploring relationships on the other side. They are devoted lovers. 9w8 individuals will be more honest and direct about their feelings. They will not resort to petty games to gain leverage in the relationship. They are not overly possessive of their partners.

Despite being calm and peaceful most of the time, the Enneagram Type Nine with an Eight-Wing can be triggered in certain situations. They can become aggressive. However, this is generally transient. With time, they go back to their original peaceful selves.

In an unhealthy state, Nines with an Eight Wing can be very aggressive. They might not be concerned with the repercussions of their violent actions. In such a state of emotional instability, their ego strength is weakened. Thus, leading to strong aggression and id impulses taking over.

In particular, jealousy of partners can trigger these aggressive impulses. When they feel separated from their partner or receiving a lack of affections, the type Nine component’s sense of self dips. On the other hand, type Eight could fuel the person to retaliate aggressively in response to their damaged pride. In such a situation, they tend to be violent towards those involves in the situation. 

The Enneagram Type Nine with an Eight-Wing live in the present. They are rarely seen swimming in thoughts of the distant future. They are more oriented to the present. They are concerned with meeting their needs in the here and now. This can act as a potential conflict point in certain relationships. This is particularly evident in a relationship with a future-oriented partner. While their partner might be eager to see how the relationship pans out in the future, the 9w8 person might not be much bothered with the same.

In a world that is constantly charting out the next plan of action, the Enneagram Type Nine with an Eight- Wing person will not worry about the future. In general, they do not worry. They like to go with the flow!

When confronted about their complacency, they can become very defensive.

9w8 Overview

Generally, Enneagram Type Nine with an Eight-Wing tends to shy away from conflict. This stems from their fear of separation from the world.  They might try to veer away from unpleasant emotions and feelings by trying to distract themselves or engaging in work. However, the element of type Eight in their personality pushes them to be assertive. Thus, this can create a sort of tug of war in the situation.  9w8 folks want a state of peacefulness inside and outside. They are very social individuals, who enjoy engaging with people. They will readily offer their support and encouragement to those in need. 9w8 folks tend to be flexible in their approach to situations. They will readily adapt to new ideas.

9w8 individuals tend to have an open mind. They are able to see different perspectives in a situation. 

There are some weak points that are associated with the 9w8 person. Firstly, they tend to avoid conflictual situations. Conflict often remains an uncharted territory for the 9w8 person. They avoid actively confronting any unpleasant feeling or emotion. Further, they often don’t give enough importance to emotions. Thus, sometimes they may come across as stubborn.

There are certain factors that can be motivating for the 9w8 person.

They find immense satisfaction in helping other individuals through their problems. In turn, they also appreciated being understood by others. They are very sociable in nature. Thus, along with engaging well with others, they also make for very efficient leaders.

Additionally, there are certain factors that can put the 9w8 person in a place of stress. They do not like their efforts to be neglected in any way. The 9w8 person appreciates freedom and independence. Thus, they do not appreciate being controlled in any way. Further, they can feel extremely stressed when they have to make any important decisions.

Type Nine

Type Nine individuals tend to roll into the laid-back mode very often. If they work with other individuals who carry the same liking for taking things easy (too easy sometimes!), it can affect their productivity at work. They like working with open-minded individuals. They do not enjoy conflictual situations, hence prefer working with people who equally share the same mindset.

Their performance at the workplace can be affected by conflict. This is particularly seen when they work with people who are commonly at the heart of conflictual situations. They can also be affected when ignored.

Type Nines can be supportive, understanding partners, especially to those who feel disconnected or misunderstood. When in a relationship with another Nine, it’s important that they take turns leading and making decisions.

They are extremely supportive partners. This ability comes naturally to them. Enneagram Type Nines acknowledge their partner’s perspective. When the relationship encounters unexpected situations, Enneagram Type Nine individuals are able to adapt to them with ease. Conflict is a dreaded territory for Enneagram Type Nine individuals. Hence, they may struggle to have discussions on uncomfortable topics with their partner. Dealing with emotionally difficult issues can be a task for the Enneagram type Nine. Expressing opinions that do not align with that of the crowd can be an uphill task for this person.

Famous Type Nine Personalities:

  • Barack Obama
  • Zoey Deschanel
  • The Dalai Lama
  • Marie Kondo
  • Abraham Lincoln

Type Eight

Type Eight folks are unlikely to be very expressive about their feelings. Yet, they experience them deeply. They may not wear their heart on their sleeves. Yet, when it comes to love, Eights can feel emotions deeply. A relationship holds an important place in their lives. When they find someone they feel strongly about, they are likely to put in all the effort to make it work. Type Eight individuals tend to be committed to the ones they love. They will ensure they are able to care for their partner. Eights might not express their love through cheesy lines and overly romantic gestures. They will be supportive of their partner, helping them to reach their goals. They tend to conscious of their partner’s need for space. They are unlikely to be overbearing, taking a step back when needed.

On the other hand, Type Eight individuals want a partner who is an equal in the relationship. They value depth and wish to have a meaningful relationship. They like a person who is able to engage with them in deep, stimulating conversations. As mentioned earlier, Eights may struggle with expressing themselves emotionally. Thus, they need a partner who can be patient with them. They want their partner to understand this expression might take a different form. They do not want their partner to make them feel bad about this tendency. If a person constantly demands them to express themselves in a certain way, Eights can be put off by such behavior.  Eights want their partner to be able to express their needs. Further, they appreciate resolving conflicts by having a rational discussion with their partner.

They want a relationship that gives both partners space and freedom.  Eights generally tend to be self-reliant. They are more likely to turn to themselves than others when they need help. They believe they are capable of doing things themselves. This tendency can clash with a partner that is controlling.

Having an overly controlling partner or too many restrictions in the relationship can be a turn-off for the type Eight person.

Famous Type Eight Personalities:

  • Aretha Franklin
  • Martin Luther King Jr.
  • Winston Churchill
  • Susan Sarandon
  • Ernest Hemingway


In this blog post, we delved into understanding 9w8 relationships. We also looked at the Enneagram Type Nine with an Eight-Wing, Type Nine and Type Eight personalities.

Frequently Asked Questions: 9w8 Relationships

What does unhealthy Nine look like?

When unhealthy, Nines tend to repress all their problems. They tend to avoid any unpleasant emotions and feelings. This can cause them to dissociate from reality (fitzel.ca).

Who are Type Nine compatible with?

Nines tend to be best matched with Type One and Type Two.

What is the rarest Enneagram type?

Type Four, also known as the Individualist is considered to be one of the rarest Enneagram type.

Which Enneagram is the smartest?

Type Five is considered to be one of the most intelligent of the nine personality types (ennagraminstitute.com).

Which Enneagram has the most anxiety?

Type Six, also known as the loyalists are most likely to be anxious (www.relconsultants.com).